The Ecstasy of Being Ordinary

So, what have you done?

The summer holidays are in full swing and the weather, obviously, is mostly rubbish. But what of the rest of life that makes up the holidays?

Well, I still haven't tidied up the craft cupboard, despite wanting to do this before they broke up. Hmm. We also haven't paid a family visit to the allotment. Another hmmmm. And a Tut.

To be honest I'm not entirely sure what we've done. There has been a fair bit of seeing friends, sleepovers, a barbecue and, of course, that wonderful festival. Maybe that's the reason why it feels like we've done a lot when we actually haven't.

Still, they don't seem to be doing too badly for it. Thanks to my Benign Neglect parenting policy (more of that later) they have been reading books like nobody's business. My top tip for getting kids to read? Don't get Sky and encourage boredom. Seems to work for mine.

We're still in the middle of reorganising the house. I'm not sure how else to describe it. The piano's been moved which seems to have unleashed a torrent of music practice in the house. Well, with some members.

It is nice, this new found love for their instruments, if a little noisy. Still, mustn't grumble.

I'm writing this as a break from wading through all the flotsam of crud that is in our house (where does it all come from? Where will it all go?) as it is boring. But, like I tell the children, boredom is good for you. I think.

I Like Drinking Tea Out of a Rose Cup

 

I am on a budget. A budget that is squeezed so tight, it squeaks and has gone a little blue. It is not much fun, I have to say. There are no new books, or old books or any books at all. (I do know about the library but that is another post).

I have lost my Boots Advantage Card so cannot squirrel away those lovely points for the odd bottle of nail varnish or lipstick. The only books I manage to buy are for the children, so my Waterstone points are used to offset Thomas the Tank engine stories and ones about vampires falling in love.

Still, I'm not down and I'm not feeling sorry for myself. I just need to get a handle on my finances a bit better. Usually I'd buy a book (which probably explains why I'm in this position) so instead I shall trawl the internet for Tips.

I don't mean things like where to get the best deal on flights to New York, more on how to track and actually manage the money I do have better.

That said, I have treated myself. I know. Absolutely. Bloody. Useless. However, I did balance it carefully. I have been collecting flowery teacups that I find in charity shops and the other week found two. Two! If you knew the rubbish but expensive pickings found in the many charity shops in my nearest town you'd be amazed too.

They came to £5. Not much, but really an awful lot if you have nothing. The joy they give me though, seeing them sit on my kitchen shelves, and to drink from is priceless. They go well with my rose teapot and sugar bowl, none of which match save for the same flower.

And they will look lovely when I have my coffee bar sorted out. Oh yes, I'm still planning that one.

Sometimes you just have to find a chink of blue sky on grey days.

Looking After Yourself When You're a Mum

Like every mother I know, I come quite low down on my list of priorities and that is fine. That is, on the whole I think, how it should be.

Sometimes though you get a bit of a wake up call, or you just feel down and you think.....hmmmm, yes, I have needs too and they are so neglected they have either died and withered away or they are shrouded in cobwebs.

About six weeks ago I went to the doctors because I had, almost every single day, a headache. It was such a part of my life, such a background hum to my day that it was only on the rare occasion when I didn't have one that I would think wow, I feel good today! Oh yes! No headache!

The crunch came when I started to get migraines. While driving the car, while in charge of lots of children, I would get the flashing weird lights and wouldn't be able to see properly. Anyone who's ever experienced them will know how disorientating they can be. It got to the point where I started to worry about going out on my own in case I had the Weird Lights.

After being checked out, the doctor said something that made me feel so stupid. It was a simple thing yet I had completely neglected it. Was I drinking enough water? Doh. How often do I nag my children about that yet it had never occurred to me that, yep, I need hydrating too and my body was trying to, with increasing shrillness, tell me it needed water.

It got me thinking how I could and should look after myself better. I will endeavour to:

• Exercise. I don't. Which is really, really bad. I am not sure what I am waiting for but it is obviously something because so far nothing has moved me.
• Eat more healthily: I don't do too badly but I could do a lot better. I really need to concentrate more on wholefood, vegetarian cooking.
• Use little things (new nail polish, a book) for a treat. And a treat means occasionally. It also does not mean a fat-laden gingerbread latte every time you go into town (tsk).
• Get rid of the clutter. This is an ongoing thing and one that Hubby is much better at than me. In the last six months he reckons we must have rid ourselves of two skips' worth. And there's still lots to do. But this is, for me, a top stress buster.
• Get organised. Easier said than done. But it's helping that the house is finally getting completed. It means that I'm writing this at a desk and will soon have a shelf. For my stuff. Yay! Another way I feel less overwhelmed.
• Spirituality. This is a tricky one but I know, as I get older, it is something I want to tend to. I'm currently reading Buddhism for Mothers by Sarah Napthali and it's wonderful.

My list is so far pretty basic but I think it covers the fundamentals. I now need to get down to the details. There are also things that I've missed off, because I'm quite good at them such as making time for hobbies and saying no to stuff I really don't want to do.

How do you look after yourself? Or is it something you need to work on too?

Girls' Room Makeover

Phew!

I have been overwhelmed with a major decorating project here that started, sigh, during half-term. Well, when I say I have been overwhelmed.....I mean I'm the Project Manager.

There is never any element of planning in our lives. Really. Quite often I plan things in my head and there they stay. This time though I told Hubby we were going to give the girls' room a much needed makeover during the holidays. Unfortunately I only gave him 48 hours' notice.

It had to be half-term because we were also going to do the boys' room too (I know, in for a penny...). Things didn't pan out quite how I envisaged (ie they took a lot longer). A lot of the junk stuff in the girls' room had to be moved into the boys' meaning no-one could sleep in their bedrooms. Hence the tight half-term deadline because I decided they would all have to a week-long sleepover on air beds in the living room.

Really, when you have no other bedrooms to put them in and no family willing to help your options are limited. It meant they had to be back upstairs in one form or another before they went back to school. Because we all know children + airbeds = over excitement, bouncing and not going to sleep til really late. That was the most stressful part. For me, anyway.

We cleared the rooms at the weekend and on Monday we went shopping for wallpaper, which is totally not how you should do it. We had decided on one pattern from Laura Ashley, but when we popped into our local store the girls (and me) fell in love with another. I have to say the little one didn't. She wanted pink. It is difficult trying to find something that would suit all three so I didn't try too hard. I'm just going to pink-ify her corner/bed/stuff. Plus we're having splashes of pink as another colour, so hopefully she'll be fine.

There are still major tweakings to do, some furniture to shift round, the desk to build, blinds to buy and other little bits to get. You know, essentials like fairy lights, bunting (possibly), shelving and pictures.

It has been quite hard squeezing everything we wanted to into the room: beds for three (obviously), old dressing table, a reading nook and a desk. It was also hard looking for inspiration as most sites are about rooms for little ones or are not shared. I'll post some more pictures when it's finished (please, not long) and about the boys' room when that's done (ditto).

I'm a Wonderin'........

•  .......if Brown Owls become really bossy because they have so many girls to look after or if they become Brown Owls because they are really bossy?

• ........when the Wretched Aga will get fixed. She is usually warm, lovely but incredibly temperamental. Currently she is cold and useless.

• ........how many more dishes I can concoct for seven on two electric rings. It feels like camping only without the fun.

• ........if I should email an Important Person or not. Fact is, I might not like the email I get in reply. So I think Not. I am nothing if not a coward.

• ........where all my books have gone? Well, not all but a good many. They've just disappeared. Poof! Puff of smoke and are gone. I suspect we have a Book Eating Gremlin.

• ........if I have got the energy for the Great Bedroom Revamp. Not one but two rooms. One week. I don't think I have a choice. The children's rooms are dire. They shall be camping on air beds in the living room while I....paint. They are looking forward to it. It'll be like camping, and just as much fun. For them. 

• ........what you're wondering?

Dreaming of Gardens........

 

This is the view I want to have out of my kitchen doors.

Spring is in the air. I'm sure I can feel it. The daffs are poking their heads out of the soil, it's lighter for longer and the birds are in fine voice. I know we have ages to go, but, honestly, it felt like she was offering us a glimpse, a reminder that she's not too far away now. Or it could just be a welcome break from the rain.

Either way I found myself immersed in the bookshop's gardening section. This is not good. Don't I know there's a recession on? Honestly, and there was February's copy of Gardener's World in my bag too. I justify the last one as necessary for my "work" with the gardening club.

Cutting garden plans - wonderful!

But really I have no justification for the action that led me to the tills clutching Cottage Gardens: Romantic Gardens for Town and Country by Toby Musgrave. Oh hold on, I know. I'm helping the economy. Yes that's it. Plus the cinnamon latte and two chocolate babychinos I also spent money on was to help too. Can't deny that I'm not civic minded.

This is how I want my future greenhouse to look in the garden.

I have flicked through the book, read the first couple of pages and drooled over the gardens. Life is a bit busy at the moment (when is it not?) but I see the book peeking out of my pile of papers, waiting until I can have the time to fully enjoy it. A promise of good times to come. A bit like glimpsing Spring.

My Kind of House

 

I love magazines. They are my financial downfall. I mean, what's not to love? Since having children, and reading blogs, my attention span is incredibly small (I am trying to rectify this with a return to reading fiction thanks to a book I bought this morning) so magazines fit the bill.

Plus there are lots of lovely pictures. Sometimes though I am a little disappointed and end up feeling like I should've saved my money. I mean, if I see one more Cath Kidston fabric, pine scrubbed table and the predictable English country look I think I shall scream.

But one mag that really floats my boat is Living Etc. Oh how I love it. I love how the homes perfectly reflect the people living there, how there are budget options and how I always finish it feeling zingy, inspired and full of ideas for our humble pad.

February's edition even contains my perfect house. I loved everything about it. Look at the stairs made from Ikea rugs! Look at the "coffee bar" (I am now prowling my kitchen, tape measure in hand, trying to see where I can squeeze one in), look at the white walls and colourful accessories. ~sigh~

My house is.....erm.....not like that. It is one big overwhelming mess. Don't be envious of friends who have builders as husbands (as one of mine is). In my experience the builder's family live in a half-finished 'home' and it's not fun. I am 99 per cent positive this is why I feel so down sometimes. More than a decade of living in a half-finished place, where you spend 99 per cent of your time, is depressing.

But I'm not going to turn this into a rant (neither you nor I have got that long). Instead I shall get to work planning my coffee bar.........

Four

Four is a whole different ball game. It is, thanks to our crazy education system in the UK, the age you start school. Four is no longer toddler but something called pre-schooler (ugh, horrible term).

It is a wonderful age. Whatever age they are you always think "ah, so lovely this age" but it is too fast. I'm still stuck at two really. It is too fast only for me. For her, and everyone else, it is right but all day I was thinking "Four? Four! Please don't go so fast. Slow down." Them, their childhood, everything is slipping through my hands. Like sand. Some bits, just like sand, can be very irritating but mostly, mostly everything is just going. As it should of course.

I think there's an expectation that with more children you have the more you get used to it all. The noise, the mess, the chaos, the squabbles, the letting go. For me it the opposite. She could be my twentieth child instead of my fourth and it wouldn't make any difference.

Partly in her honour the craft cupboard has been moved. She loves creating and this will make it easier. It is now next to the kitchen table, missing some door knobs, half the varnish stripped off. I was going to paint it red, buy new knobs but that was three years ago. I'm planning on doing a lot of crafting with her between now and September.

Ticking Off

Christmas present buying is wrapped up. PHEW! Never been this organised before and I must say it is lovely. I plan to spend December in a haze of calm and jollity.

It was quite a productive weekend. Things on my Honey Do list are also getting ticked off, the little niggley jobs that I'm unable to do are getting wrapped up. There are, of course, rather large jobs that seemed to have stalled (new shower room? Family room?) but I'll just gloss over those.

It's the kitchen that is my main focus at this time of year and while it is lovely having my very own builder on hand, it does mean that I have to wait an awfully long time for things to get done so I was very pleased when my magnetic spice pots went up. And my magnetic strip for the knives.

I keep telling him I am so very easy to please. And low maintenance. They were both from Ikea and so were cheap versions of rather more expensive ones I'd spotted.

And the positive of waiting so long to get the room finished? That has to be how a couple of little things induce such joy. By spreading the jobs out for so long I'm also spreading the happiness. Or that's what I tell myself.......