Carrots and Kids

Shiny and New

 

Well, that was a funny old Christmas. Lovely. But over so quickly. There was a fair bit of illness but I'm glad, in a way, that it happened over the festive hols when we had no obligation to be anywhere (well, we did but cancelled).

All of the children go back next week and, without sounding like a sad sap, I'm not really looking forward to it. Usually, I get annoyed with mothers who blog how much they will miss their kids - like somehow they're relationship is extra special - but this time I'm one of them. Fickle is my middle name. And Hypocrite.

I am also returning to college and have that Sunday night feeling already. I don't, if I am honest, want to go. At all. Although that feeling brooks no argument with anyone here. It's just so stressful, fitting it in. And hard. The work is hard. Whine. Whine.

Obviously, with my goldfish-like memory I forget how bored I became at home. How my life felt like it shrunk. How I forget that a career, money and a pension of my own would be really rather fabulous.

So, in the spirit of forgetting, here's what I would like to do in the home and garden this year (studying allowing):

• De-clutter. I can't do any of this until the building work is done. But I am yearning for a good old tidy up
• Fix the greenhouse. Stupid, plastic thing
  
• Sow my tomato seeds this month
• Do more gardening. Just like I used to. I don't think I did any, really, last year. I miss it
• Bake really good bread regularly
  
• Get to grips with my sewing machine
• Add more design to the front garden
• Plant roses. Lots and lots and lots
• Visit the Chelsea Flower Show this year
• Visit the allotment little and often

This aren't new year resolutions but it is good to have goals. Perhaps I should add 'blog a bit more' to the list but I am a Lazy Blogger so perhaps not. Thank you for all your lovely comments on my last post though, I really was surprised anyone was still out there!

Do you have any plans for this year?

Change

I am going to be predictably boring and lament the fact that it's now July. JULY! The speed that time whizzes by never ceases to amaze me.

Of course, I had to check the calendar (word of the day one - today's word? Wormhole) because looking outside you wouldn't know it was midsummer. It feels like we had a very short spring and then have fast forwarded to autumn.

I have managed to waste a whole morning doing not very much when in fact I should be doing Lots of Important Things. So it goes. There is much physical stuff to sort out here as we emptied our entire loft at the weekend in preparation for building work.

Yes, that sentence does strike fear in my heart. Being surrounded by boxes upon boxes (containing things pertaining to camping, Christmas and memories) has had a bit of an unsettling effect on me.

I don't work well amid chaos. Some order is essential for sanity. Plus, rifling through lots of old things (who knew me and Hubby had exchanged SO MANY love letters) is a bit like waving your hand into a crystal clear rock pool. There are some gems to be had but mostly you can't see clearly because everything's been muddied.

There is a lot of detris floating around, mostly centering around lost opportunities and people. I'm sure things will settle down soon. I just never imagined getting rid of stuff would really have such an effect.

It's funny, I've been thinking, how life changing events seem quite innocuous at the time but it's only on looking back that you realise their impact on your life, of roads taken as a result of that small event.

And so it happened with me back in March. Around the time, I think, that I stopped blogging here and generally fell out of love with the whole shebang.

Now here I am plotting the next five or six years of my life, something that is so alien to me. I am hoping my future will include university. Which one and doing what has still to be decided but it's exciting and scary in equal measure.

{gardening with glue}

The weather has been grim. I'm pretty sure it's been horrid throughout the whole of the UK. And strange. After the hardest rain I've seen in a long time there was blue sky.

But I'm not complaining. After all I wasn't out in it. But I am hoping this is not a sign of things to come, weather-wise, in 2012. Please.

Still, it did mean that I could get on with doing a rather favourite form of gardening. That of gardening with glue. While I like reading gardening books, it's pictures that help form my ideas and get me inspired.

So in lieu of seed catalogues which are winging their way to me, I cut up some old magazines which was a form of decluttering and Fantasy Gardening.

I'm not setting myself up for a fall, I'm fully aware that I have neither the skill or the money to transform my garden but I do need to do something with both the front and back and this scrapbook will help.

{gardening goals}

 

I'm not normally a fan of the new year but after the December I've had I am greeting 2012 like an old friend, and smothering it in kisses.

And because this blog shouldn't be a depository for all my moaning I won't go on about the car that cost £1,700 to fix, the boiler that broke down or a lurgy picked up at school that saw all seven of us ill with three on antibiotics.

All in the two weeks before Christmas.

But no, I'm not dwelling on that or the utter exhaustion that has shrouded these holidays. To say I am looking forward to a bit of peace tomorrow is probably understating it somewhat.

I'm also looking forward to getting a few things achieved this year. I know resolutions are sticks we use to beat ourselves over the head, but it's hard to resist filling the blank pages of a new year with hopes and dreams.

But I'm calling mine goals. I figure they sound more achievable that way and less angst-making if they fail to leave the pages of my notebook.

In fact, there are so many things I want to get a handle on this year I am, yet again, feeling paralysed by feelings of overwhelm.

So I've made extensive lists, including a section entitled Gardening Goals. These are, in no particular order:

• Visit the allotment every week. Prioritise it
• Order three David Austin roses (I have until March to get the bare rooted ones in) to grow through the picket fence
• Paint the picket fence before the roses grow
• Organise and paint the potting shed - I feel this will feature in a few posts
• Plan and plant the Lotion and Potion patch
• Turn the unused bit of front garden into a cutting garden
• Transform the side bit of the house into a shady-loving plant haven
• Buy and fit a wooden gate so the above haven is a private one
• Get back to enjoying gardening.

The last one is probably the most important one. Thanks to the internet I do feel pangs of gardening inadequacy but I need to ignore what everyone else is doing. Really.

Have you any gardening goals?

{Reclaiming}

I'm not sure I can string a coherent post together. Exhaustion, online fatigue (I really, really must take a break from reading blogs and Twitter) and thoughts that flit out of my brain just as quickly as they flit in means I'm finding this tricky.

Oh I have lots to say, but I'm not entirely sure they're not all variations of the same thing. Plus, every time I write a post I get at least one person unsubscribe (I get very helpful emails informing me). Which is fine, I'd just rather not know about it. I don't know how many subcribers I've got (probably around two now?) but it's a bit...off-putting.

If I write about gardening people leave and if I write about something else people leave. So what I'm trying to say is - I'm reclaiming my blog. It's all for me. If you like it enough to comment or link to me that's lovely but if you dislike it enough to unsub, well...*shrugs*.

I'm not going to write about the riots. We know it's so awfully shocking and heartbreaking. I've tried not to watch any news with little people about but have talked about it with my teens. I've also listened to some interesting debates on Radio 4 and it's given me, in my little sheltered world, much to think about.

As I type this in my dressing gown it's pitch black outside but I can still hear the combines harvesting. That's quite comforting. I know I've been terribly guilty about taking where we live for granted but it's something I deeply appreciate now. Silly me.

So here's a list of things I'm thinking about that may (wahey!) make it into a blog post or two one day:

1. My plans for September: they are mounting up
2. A new blog? Can I be arsed? Should I just change the focus of this one? There's so much else I want to say, other than about gardening
3. My new "cafe area" in the garden, no less
4. Self-reliance
5. My role as a full-time mum
6. My would-be potting shed
7. Our back garden
8. Choices we've made
9. The blogs I love (am thinking of writing some blogging love letters via email)
10. The summer holidays.

Oooh, my brain feels like it's just been decluttered.

Simple Life Projects

Just lately I've been streamlining my life. Simplifying it. Not for any particular reason but I just feel compelled to, which is slightly odd but I'm going with it.

This simplifying has taken on many forms, but it all boils down to the same thing: shedding. So I've shed excess weight (34.5lbs so far!), possessions and commitments.

The latter includes things that are coming to a natural end (like the gardening club) and endings that I've initiated. I've discovered that I don't want to spend vast tracts of my life and time online (you may have noticed...).

This freeing up of my time and space means that I can concentrate on getting to grips with a few projects such as:

• Planning and eventually transforming one of my raised veggie beds at home into a herb bed. I've never had one this big before so the possibilities are quite exciting
• Creating and making my own potions and lotions using the herbs
• Major decluttering and organising in the home (this sounds boring but it'll be transformative, I tell ya)
• Learning to make my own clothes. Sewing machines frustrate me no end but I'm determined not to be beaten!
• Baking bread - regularly
• Becoming more proficient at knitting. I'm still ploughing on with my little project and will update soon
• Learn to crochet
• Photographing with vintage cameras and film.

Of course, life will still have it's stressful moments and days (she says wearily) but I'm hoping my responses will be different. I'm hoping that my "work" will give me solace and some grounding instead of the little things, like taking photos, being blotted out by the dark clouds of anxiety.

I'm always on the look out for future project ideas - do you have any you're planning or doing right now?

A Weekly To Do List

Now this may seem utterly boring, but I am always so nosy that peeking at others' to do lists is not a chore. This is, of course, no ordinary one but my gardening list. Now that I am waking up a bit I need to Get Myself Sorted.

Of course, I could merely write it in a notebook but those have a habit of going missing or remaining unopened so if you do find it all tedious it's probably best to look away now...

• Take part in the RSPB's Big Garden Birdwatch this weekend. It's only for an hour and I'm not overly hopeful about seeing much (particularly if our neighbour keeps up with his pneumatic drill) but still
• Start chitting my seed potatoes. As of writing I haven't bought any but am planning to nip to the garden centre to remedy this. As we all know, all work and no play is very boring
• Make some bird cakes
• Order my tomato seeds. Yes, I know I am horribly lax
• Sort out my greenhouse. You seriously do not want to see it as it is but I may post a picture of the result. After all, there's no point in all of us being depressed
• Have a bonfire. I have waited months, months I tell you, for The Husband to transport some very large cuttings from the front garden as promised. Now I'm taking matters into my own hands
• Finally, finally sort out a plan for the front. Quite frankly, I'm so fed up with it that I would happily restore it to its former "glory" of two small flower beds under the windows and lawn. Although don't hold me to that....

At my current work rate I reckon I should get one of the above crossed off. And that may well be the one involving me staring at birds from the comfort of a kitchen chair.

My Gardening Resolutions

I'm not usually one for resolutions; there are enough things I can and do feel guilty about on a regular basis without drawing up a list of others. I much prefer adopting a Word of the Year which, strangely, I haven't done yet.

For me, September also feels like a new year. But I obviously cannot escape the fact that time is spinning ever faster and now we're in 2011. I've never before made Gardening Resolutions but, let's face it, while I do not want to become all Serious and Stressed about it, I do indeed need to Prioritise Gardening a little more.

Otherwise, I'm not gardening. I might as well hang up my trowel and rename this blog Couch Potato and Kids.

So, really in an effort to focus my mind during this year, here are my Gardening Resolutions:

• Organisation: I need to divide my time a bit more evenly between the three raised beds at home (which shall be known as the Home Patch) and the allotment. At the moment it's either/or. While one has lots of love, time and attention lavished on it (and it could be either of them) the other takes on a neglected air. It's a bit like being caught between two lovers (I would imagine)

• Labelling: This, as you may know, is a bit of a grey area for me. Grey as in I'm not very good at it and when anyone asks me the name of the dahlia or flower I'm in raptures about I inwardly cringe and confess I don't know. So a priority I think

• Finish The Front Garden: Oh goodness, I feel a bit stressed just thinking about this. But really, it needs to be finished. Although there are so many other things the money should be spent on. I suppose I could try and do it on a budget. But then again, I will still have to buy some plants. See? I'm even driving myself crazy

• Sort Out The Greenhouse: This is looking a bit sorry for itself. Some of the panels have popped out thanks to the snow. My "potting table" is a mess of....er....stuff. Last year I envisaged happy hours spent in the spring listening to Radio 7, drinking coffee and gardening inside it. For reasons that escape me that never really happened. Well, not for any decent length of time. This year it will though

• To Enjoy It. Really, despite what some people say, it is just gardening. And by that I mean, for me, it is and should be hugely enjoyable. It doesn't really matter what others are doing. Or if they have more knowledge. Hopefully I'll be still doing this when I'm 70 and still learning. And enjoying it. I'm looking forward to that.

I hope you all had a great Christmas and a wonderful New Year. Have you made any gardening resolutions?

Things I Am Thinking...

• Thanks to everyone for your seed catalogue suggestions. I am planning on ordering Seeds of Italy, Suttons, Pennard Plants, Jungle Seeds and the Organic Gardening Catalogue

• I have done nothing with the front garden so I really need to set aside some money (what money?) and get cracking. Even if it is winter

• I am going to revamp the blog a little. Add some bits on the side ->  Improve things a tad

• Set up a new blog. Yes, I know, I need another one like a hole in the head. That one would purely be for pictures, so I can tinker really

• Remember to plant my garlic and broad beans at home. Now!

• Organise and sort out the greenhouse. It has been sorely neglected plus, it has no heating so is cold. But with my new wristwarmers, a steaming mug of coffee and Radio 7 keeping me company I shan't notice the cold

• Finish knitting the wristwarmers (can you spot anything here?!).

What's on your mind?

November is a great month to....

• Grow some sprouting seeds on your kitchen windowsill (more to come on this)

• Drink lots of hot chocolate

• Make your Christmas pudding on Stir Up Sunday, November 21 (actually we might make our Christmas cake but it will invoke the season of giving and involve stirring). There are lots of Christmas pudding recipes

• Dig up your veggie beds so the frosts can break up the clods

• Make some wrist warmers (I seem to remember this appearing on October's list....)

• Plant your garlic

• Go for a walk. In the wind, rain, drizzle, gloom. Whatever the weather (really should take my own advice more....)

• Embrace stodge. Dumplings? Crumbles? Jacket pots? Eat 'em and love 'em

• Order seed catalogues

• Aim to have Christmas shopping all wrapped up (literally) by the end of November, leaving December free for foodie/decorating/sniffing at nativity-type things.